August 25th, 2025
by Joel Sosa
by Joel Sosa
Losing Count: The Power of Forgiveness in an Age of Offense
In a world where offense seems to lurk around every corner, how can we as believers navigate the choppy waters of human relationships without sinking under the weight of hurt and anger? The answer lies in a radical approach to forgiveness that challenges us to not just forgive once, but to make it a lifestyle.
Imagine a world where Christians were known as the most unoffendable people on the planet. It sounds counterintuitive, doesn't it? After all, we live in what could be called an "age of rage," where taking offense has become almost a cultural pastime. Yet, this is precisely the calling we have as followers of Christ – to choose grace over grudges, to lose count rather than keep score.
The trap of offense is a subtle one. It's like bait on a hook, enticing us to bite, only to find ourselves ensnared. The Greek word for offense, "skandalon," is where we get the word scandal. It's a trap set by the enemy, not to harm us directly (for he cannot), but to influence us into a prison of hurt and isolation.
Jesus himself warned us that offenses would come. In Luke 17:1, He states that it's impossible to go through life without being offended at some point. The question isn't whether we'll face offense, but how we'll respond when it inevitably arrives at our doorstep.
So how do we break free from this cycle of offense and unforgiveness? The answer lies in recognizing the trap, releasing the offense, and replacing the poison of hurt with grace.
Recognizing the trap means being aware that offenses will come our way. It's not a matter of if, but when. By anticipating this reality, we can prepare our hearts to respond with grace rather than react with anger.
Releasing the offense is where the rubber meets the road. It's one thing to recognize we've been offended; it's another entirely to let it go. This is where Jesus' teaching becomes particularly challenging. When Peter asked how many times he should forgive someone who sins against him, suggesting seven times as a generous number, Jesus' response was staggering: "Not seven times, but seventy-seven times" (Matthew 18:22). Some translations render this as "seventy times seven," or 490 times!
The point isn't the exact number, but the principle: forgiveness should be so frequent that we lose count. It's a lifestyle, not a one-time event.
But why is forgiveness so crucial? Because unforgiveness festers frustration, while forgiveness fosters healing. It's not just about the person who wronged us; it's about freeing ourselves from the prison of bitterness and resentment.
Replacing the poison of hurt with grace is the final step in this process. Grace isn't just about salvation; it's for everyday life. It's the understanding that as the forgiven, we are called to forgive. Offended people tend to offend others, creating a vicious cycle. But healed people have the power to heal others through their grace and forgiveness.
This radical approach to forgiveness isn't easy. It goes against our natural inclinations. When we're hurt, we want justice. We want the other person to feel the pain they've caused us. But Jesus calls us to a higher standard. In Matthew 6:14-15, He makes a startling statement: "For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."
This isn't about earning God's forgiveness through our own acts of forgiveness. Rather, it's about reflecting the character of the One who has forgiven us. How can we, who have been forgiven an immeasurable debt, refuse to forgive the relatively small debts others owe us?
So how do we practically live out this lifestyle of forgiveness? Here are four key steps:
1. Pray quickly: As soon as you feel the sting of offense, turn to God in prayer.
2. Forgive first and fast: Don't wait for the other person to apologize or make amends. Take the initiative to forgive.
3. Release it quickly: Hand the situation over to God, trusting Him to deal with it justly.
4. Replace it with love: Instead of dwelling on the hurt, actively pray for and seek the good of the person who offended you.
This approach to forgiveness doesn't mean we become doormats or that we stay in abusive situations. Wisdom and boundaries are still important. But it does mean that we refuse to let offense take root in our hearts, poisoning our relationships and stunting our spiritual growth.
Imagine the impact we could have on the world if we truly lived this way. In a culture quick to take offense and slow to forgive, we could stand out as beacons of grace and reconciliation. We could be the ones who bring healing to broken relationships, who bridge divides, who reflect the heart of God in a world desperate for His love.
The choice is ours. Will we keep meticulous count of every wrong done to us, or will we lose count in our eagerness to forgive? Will we allow ourselves to be trapped by offense, or will we embrace the freedom that comes with forgiveness?
Today, let's make a decision to live differently. Let's choose to recognize the traps of offense, to release hurts quickly, to replace bitterness with grace, and to repeat this process daily. As we do, we'll find that not only are we setting others free, but we ourselves are being liberated from the heavy chains of unforgiveness.
In this age of offense, let's be known not for how easily we're offended, but for how quickly we forgive. Let's lose count, and in doing so, gain the abundant life Jesus promised – a life marked by freedom, joy, and the transformative power of grace.
In a world where offense seems to lurk around every corner, how can we as believers navigate the choppy waters of human relationships without sinking under the weight of hurt and anger? The answer lies in a radical approach to forgiveness that challenges us to not just forgive once, but to make it a lifestyle.
Imagine a world where Christians were known as the most unoffendable people on the planet. It sounds counterintuitive, doesn't it? After all, we live in what could be called an "age of rage," where taking offense has become almost a cultural pastime. Yet, this is precisely the calling we have as followers of Christ – to choose grace over grudges, to lose count rather than keep score.
The trap of offense is a subtle one. It's like bait on a hook, enticing us to bite, only to find ourselves ensnared. The Greek word for offense, "skandalon," is where we get the word scandal. It's a trap set by the enemy, not to harm us directly (for he cannot), but to influence us into a prison of hurt and isolation.
Jesus himself warned us that offenses would come. In Luke 17:1, He states that it's impossible to go through life without being offended at some point. The question isn't whether we'll face offense, but how we'll respond when it inevitably arrives at our doorstep.
So how do we break free from this cycle of offense and unforgiveness? The answer lies in recognizing the trap, releasing the offense, and replacing the poison of hurt with grace.
Recognizing the trap means being aware that offenses will come our way. It's not a matter of if, but when. By anticipating this reality, we can prepare our hearts to respond with grace rather than react with anger.
Releasing the offense is where the rubber meets the road. It's one thing to recognize we've been offended; it's another entirely to let it go. This is where Jesus' teaching becomes particularly challenging. When Peter asked how many times he should forgive someone who sins against him, suggesting seven times as a generous number, Jesus' response was staggering: "Not seven times, but seventy-seven times" (Matthew 18:22). Some translations render this as "seventy times seven," or 490 times!
The point isn't the exact number, but the principle: forgiveness should be so frequent that we lose count. It's a lifestyle, not a one-time event.
But why is forgiveness so crucial? Because unforgiveness festers frustration, while forgiveness fosters healing. It's not just about the person who wronged us; it's about freeing ourselves from the prison of bitterness and resentment.
Replacing the poison of hurt with grace is the final step in this process. Grace isn't just about salvation; it's for everyday life. It's the understanding that as the forgiven, we are called to forgive. Offended people tend to offend others, creating a vicious cycle. But healed people have the power to heal others through their grace and forgiveness.
This radical approach to forgiveness isn't easy. It goes against our natural inclinations. When we're hurt, we want justice. We want the other person to feel the pain they've caused us. But Jesus calls us to a higher standard. In Matthew 6:14-15, He makes a startling statement: "For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."
This isn't about earning God's forgiveness through our own acts of forgiveness. Rather, it's about reflecting the character of the One who has forgiven us. How can we, who have been forgiven an immeasurable debt, refuse to forgive the relatively small debts others owe us?
So how do we practically live out this lifestyle of forgiveness? Here are four key steps:
1. Pray quickly: As soon as you feel the sting of offense, turn to God in prayer.
2. Forgive first and fast: Don't wait for the other person to apologize or make amends. Take the initiative to forgive.
3. Release it quickly: Hand the situation over to God, trusting Him to deal with it justly.
4. Replace it with love: Instead of dwelling on the hurt, actively pray for and seek the good of the person who offended you.
This approach to forgiveness doesn't mean we become doormats or that we stay in abusive situations. Wisdom and boundaries are still important. But it does mean that we refuse to let offense take root in our hearts, poisoning our relationships and stunting our spiritual growth.
Imagine the impact we could have on the world if we truly lived this way. In a culture quick to take offense and slow to forgive, we could stand out as beacons of grace and reconciliation. We could be the ones who bring healing to broken relationships, who bridge divides, who reflect the heart of God in a world desperate for His love.
The choice is ours. Will we keep meticulous count of every wrong done to us, or will we lose count in our eagerness to forgive? Will we allow ourselves to be trapped by offense, or will we embrace the freedom that comes with forgiveness?
Today, let's make a decision to live differently. Let's choose to recognize the traps of offense, to release hurts quickly, to replace bitterness with grace, and to repeat this process daily. As we do, we'll find that not only are we setting others free, but we ourselves are being liberated from the heavy chains of unforgiveness.
In this age of offense, let's be known not for how easily we're offended, but for how quickly we forgive. Let's lose count, and in doing so, gain the abundant life Jesus promised – a life marked by freedom, joy, and the transformative power of grace.
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